How You Know You Have Reached 40 Something

Oh the dreadful “over the hill”.  Somedays I feel like I am already buried in the hill but here is a list of just a few things that remind me I have reached the age of 40 something.

  • When riding in the car and you turn the station to “Hair Nation” ((don’t judge me)) and your kids look at you like you have just turned on a foreign language.  Along with your husband who is five years younger can’t stop making fun of you for listening to such a station.
  • When you wake up but it takes you 30 minutes for the “overnight kinks” to get the hell out of your body.
  • When the first cup of coffee is only for the flavor….it takes 3 or 4 more to actually wake you up.

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  • Your nipples are just about headed south for the winter…well actually for the rest of your life unless you get a boob job.
  • Your menstrual cycle is no longer referred to as a period,  it’s now more like a huge freudian ink blot.
  • You can no longer be friends with hard liquor.  The hangovers that used to take a day to recover from now take no less then a week.
  • You walk into rooms forgetting what the fuck you came in there for…oh wait that’s been something I’ve done most of my life…I blamed pot before…now I just blame it on being over 40.
  • A “wild” night consists of being out until midnight.
  • The “little black dress” now goes past the knees and half way to the ankles.

Turning 40 #overthehill #aging #gettingolder

  • Your hair brush looks like a small furry animal.
  • It’s time for the dreadful squashing of the boobs in which is referred to as a mammogram…is someone sending my boobs a note?
  • You’ve replaced movies like “91/2 Weeks” with watching “The Food Network”.
  • It’s time to start worrying about retirement money that doesn’t exist.
  • You value your sleep.  Sleep has suddenly become the most prized possession.
  • In high school you could eat a salad and work out to lose 10 pounds…now you would literally have to go on an episode of “Naked And Afraid” to lose any substantial amount of weight.
  • You purchase alcohol, and you break into your rendition of “the happy dance”, if the cashier asks you for your ID.
  • Every time you look in the mirror you notice another patch of gray hair not just a single hair here and there.

Turning 40 #overthehill #aging #gettingolder

  • Your mood swings have become more like large capsules of time.
  • You squint at everything forgetting that your glasses are sitting on top of your head.

I am sure there are many more but at 40 something I can’t remember.

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48 comments

  1. •When the first cup of coffee is only for the flavor….it takes 3 or 4 more to actually wake you up. – SERIOUSLY. 🙂 (never used to be a coffee drinker)

    •You can no longer be friends with hard liquor. The hangovers that used to take a day to recover from now take no less then a week. -HELLO YES- more than a couple of beers and I’m up all night… and can’t eat certain things anymore or get heartburn.

    •A “wild” night consists of being out until midnight.- Shit that is wild, ours is 10pm.

    •The “little black dress” now goes past the knees and half way to the ankles.- stop wearing those at 30 something- stopped with the skirts at 40 something. Pants or shorts only

    YUP forgetful… I blame that on the kids.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Oh….lol…I really am glad that none of my previous life is somewhere on the internet …as for the kiddos …well their entire lives will be in chronological order via the internet. But there are still ways to control that. **evil grin**

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  2. LOL! I am right there with you! Everything from the glasses on my head to the overnight kinks! Oh, and sleep… I would pay a million dollars (that I don’t have!), to get a good night’s sleep!!! #wineandboobs

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ah this has made me think. The most annoying part for me is that I often have to read small stuff with one eye closed, even with glasses on. By the evening my eyes are so tired that one refuses to do its job.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Now my wife was age checked when trying to buy wine at the age of 37. I found this hilarious but she was afronted! Anyway, I’m five years younger than her and her taste in radio station is not anything like mine! #WineandBoobs

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    1. My husband and I actually both like the same music I just happen to like the “Hair Nation” station cause the songs remind me of my younger years…I don’t think he likes to be reminded of his younger years so he makes jokes of the station. And if your wife is being carded at 37 then that means she has goon genes 🙂 even though my husband is 5 years younger then me…people think I’m the younger one 😉

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  5. hahaha! Funny & witty as always. Such a great list! I especially like the point about doing the stupid things pre-internet phew! And the little black dress getting longer lol :)I’m visiting you today from #linkalist xx

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I am only 23 and do half of these.. I don’t remember the last time I was out until 12 and have sworn off alcohol because of the monthly hangover that follows! Haha, great list!
    Thanks for linking up to #linkalist x

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  7. LOL! I am right there with you, 40 something! And sleep, I used to think it was a waste of time, now I lay in bed for hours and can’t fall asleep…now that is a waste of time!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Hair nation?! What’s this and, if it’s good is it on digital?! We’ve been occasionally listening to Capital 80’s (or whatever it is) because I want to sing and dance like no one’s watching to songs I know the words too. #alittlebitofeverything

    Liked by 1 person

  9. OMG I am 39 and do you know how many of these apply to me??? The Hair Nation one! Oh my! They refer to the good music as classic rock now! What???? I have started rewatching That Metal Show and recording the metal videos on Vh1. That is the music!!! And the other one, Food Network all the way! I started that several years ago. I have worn glasses since I was 8 so that one don’t count but it is getting worse…..ugh. Thanks for sharing and for the chuckle! Thanks for linking up! #Alittlebitofeverything

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  10. LOL funny & witty as always my friend. I laughed at the overnight kinks. Having a younger husband brings extra mockery, my husband is only 18months younger but h holds it over my head! I’m in on the store idea – sign me up! #alittlebitofeverything x

    Liked by 1 person

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