What Kind Of Kids Are We Raising?

What Kind Of Kids Are We Raising #kids #raisingkids #parenting

It’s a question I have been asking myself A LOT lately.  What Kind Of Kids Are We Raising?

The spark that finally lit the flame was as I was glancing through one of my local Facebook pages, I find a discussion being made about some comments that were found on a website about Winnemucca’s school system.  As a mother, with one child in the school system (high school) and one starting (elementary school), of course I had to read on. It was basically some parents talking about how their kids weren’t learning anything and that the teachers were all worthless, discriminative, and only cared if you come from a family of money, your kids are actively in sports, or your last name means something.  I don’t know about you, but the last time I checked there weren’t any celebrities living here.

I will be the first to admit that when it comes to homework and teaching math and science…there is no part of it that I feel like doing.  But I also understand that as a parent it is my responsibility to help and teach my child.  On the same note, I also know that they are capable of doing certain things themselves, and will persist that point across when needed.

As a parent you can’t rely on the school system to teach them everything they need to know.  If you don’t trust in the school system, then get more actively involved ….meaning… make appointments with staff, teachers, and anyone else who will listen to what it is you need to be heard.  Get to know your children’s teachers and show them that you are concerned about your child’s school performance.

What Kind OF Kids Are We Raising #parenting #raisingkids

I think certain measures only need to be taken if the act of going to school everyday is causing serious mental anxiety on your child.  If your child comes home complaining that a teacher raised their voice at them or told them to shut up be quiet and sit down (I am talking middle school to high school)…stop and think how many times you have done that.  Try to think about the teacher who is responsible for multiple students in one class.  I can only speak for myself, but I have a lot of respect for any one person, especially a teacher, that could handle that many revolving attitudes at once.  That’s not saying that there aren’t any “bad teachers” out there either.  I do know first hand from having two teenage boys in the school system that not every teacher is justified of having the profession of teaching.

It amazes me how upset I have seen some parents get because their kid got a scolding from a teacher.  If your child one day decides they want to join the military, how do you think his/her drill sergeant is going to talk to them.  We are preparing our kids for LIFE people! Wake up and quit whining unless you have a real reason to whine about something.

What Kind Of Kids Are We Raising #parenting #raisingkids

The word bullying is thrown around so much these days that I am beginning to wonder if they are going to create a medication for it.  Yes, I understand that bullying exists…you give me a decade that it hasn’t?  I remember being bullied several times throughout my “school life” but back then we just dealt with it an moved on.   This doesn’t mean teach your kids to be bullies but rather teach them to defend themselves mentally and physically against said bullies.  Teach your kids to be smarter than the bullies.  Start this by teaching them at home that life isn’t always fair and you have to just get back up, dust your pants off, and move on!

If your child is having mental breakdowns from social media then GET THEM OFF THE INTERNET.  Close their social media accounts.  If they aren’t level-headed enough to understand that people can be hurtful via certain social medias then they aren’t mature enough to be on the computer unless it’s to look up info for a homework assignment.  If social media is causing a problem….SHUT IT DOWN!  Be parents!   Because by you letting them walk all over you, you are only teaching them to let someone else walk all over them.

Just voicing my opinion,

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I am linking this post with the following fab linkys:

Domesticated Momster
My Random Musings

62 comments

    1. It’s a catch 22 in so many ways because of course we don’t want to raise wussies but we don’t want to raise ignorant menaces to society either (well at least some I know don’t) It’s truly finding the medium. Thanks for reading.

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  1. Food for thought !! I’m a big softy when dealing with my kids and believe in a total democratic house. I was brought up that way and have never felt the need to Rebel.
    However, I do see your point about boundaries and feel it is my duty as a parent to teach respect for self and others.
    So next time they are running around and screaming their heads off, I will say to them ” In the words of DomMom, sit down and shut the hell up “

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lol you crack me up nottydaddy! I think this is the first time you’ve commented on my blog! Welcome! I’m more of a softy with my kids and my husband the drill sergeant so it all balances out 😉 we deal with problems together as a team!

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  2. Very good read, Trista! From a teacher’s perspective, I completely agree with you. Many parents today expect educators to have sole responsibility to teach their children everything they need to know. It makes the job much more difficult when there is no support or reinforcement from home. And some parents believe that their kids can do no wrong. When their child is acting up, they blame the school or the teacher for the problem. Everyone needs to work together. Parents and teachers should respect one another and communicate for the sake of the children. Thank you so much for hosting #momsterslink, Trista! ❤ xx

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    1. Well said Katie! I remember visiting a teacher one time for parent/teacher conference and he said to me…”You always know the kids who’s parents won’t be coming to parent/teacher conferences”. I thought to myself wow that seems so strange to me but now that I have been a mother for awhile now I can see the kids who’s parents just leave raising them, up to everyone else. Sad and aggravating really. I have much respect for you teachers…so much sacrifice and very little pay and then not to feel rewarded because some parent has to be disrespectful….ugh…burns my hide. Thanks for linking up lovely! Always enjoy you here!

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  3. I have found that many of the parents who complain the most are the same ones who never get involved at school and don’t want to take responsibility for their own child’s behavior. Everything is someone else’s fault.
    You are absolutely right, our job as a parent is to raise that child to be the best adult he or she can be. It is HARD, and different for every child.
    Oddly, my blog in your linky this week is on conflict resolution with children; great minds and all…

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    1. Oh I am looking forward to reading it! I try to be the best mom I can be and teach my kids the best way I know how and I know there will still be pitfalls to deal with. It’s just life of parenting. Something so many seem to forget to do once they’ve brought another sole into the world. Thank you so much for linking up with me each week!

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  4. I agree with you 100%!!! It is my job to teach my kids how to act and how to be an adult. I think people forget how much teachers sacrifice to help our kids learn more. They aren’t paid tons of money to sit in a classroom with 25 kids who don’t want to listen or be mad fun of behind their back. Teachers are some of the most selfless people. Thanks for sharing! #momsterslink
    Kristen

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    1. I have much respect for all of you for what you do and how little you get paid. And I have found that there are way more good teachers then there are not so good. I just think more parents need to get involved with what’s going on with their kids instead of just assuming everything their kid is telling them is true. Hope you have a wonderful school year!

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  5. I totally agree… definitely worth reading! Yes, bullies are everywhere and sometimes we can’t avoid them, so the best thing we can equipped out kids with is to teach them how to defend themselves and move on, don’t let bullies rule and even ruin their lives. Thanks for sharing! #momserslink

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  6. Social media is a scary additional factor to childhood now. It just to be just word of mouth bullying – which was bad enough. Now, kids can ruin each other’s reputation publically online. It’s so different from when I was little. Very thought provoking post hun #momsterlink x

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  7. I agree that parents have become overly determined to make everything the fault and responsibility of schools these days. They are teaching your kids, you are still expected to raise your kids! I must admit that cyberbullying does really throw me. I get that it’s awful & it’s cruel, I get that people say much worse things online because they can hide behind the anonymity, but I don’t get why people don’t just turn it off & ignore it. Clearly there is something that drags people into continuing to look and stay on social media when they’re being bullied, but I don’t really get it. Certainly if your kids are being cyberbullied, and you know about it, as you say disconnect them! I don’t plan to let my children use social media until they are quite old – I want them to develop a stable sense of self that isn’t based on the opinions of a load of people who don’t really know them online. But that is just me – I appreciate the kids probably won’t be happy about it when all their friends are on facebook!

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    1. I’ve got one teenager and 3 toddlers. My teen is on social media but he’s also a boy who understands people can be mean and he’s learned to just ignore them and not care…he has plenty of people who think he’s great and doesn’t let the others bring him down…but I still monitor and stay on top of things. I can only imagine what type of social media there will be when my toddlers get to be teens 😖

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  8. Fab post!I think it seems easier for some to blame anyone but themselves when their kids are being disrespectful.My eldest was always moaning that a certain teacher hated him but on going to parents evening all geared up to have a word I realised that it was because he was too busy chatting to his mates and not listening in his particular class!Words were had #snotallaboutyou

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    1. Yes it’s funny cause my teenager will complain about a teacher so I tell him I will make an appt to meet with the teacher and suddenly his tune changes. I think as parents it’s important for us to get involved in our kids education sometimes… To get to the bottom of things and not just sit around and bash people without knowing the truth. Thanks for popping over!

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  9. I think a lot of people think that once their kids are in school, their responsibility for teaching is over. Its also easy to blame somebody else if your kids turns out to be a tool and doesn’t put forth the effort

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    1. It really amazes me how many parents check out from parenting or too many parents trying to be their kids “best friend”. That day I read all that it just hit a nerve with me and off on a rant I went. Thanks for linking up with #momsterslink! Hope you had a great vacation!

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  10. We seam to be having a bit of a crisis in our schools in England reguarding teachers authority. Parents who do not discipline their children, and further more stomp and create a fuss if the teachers try to do so. This is leading to a generation of children who do not respect authority, and who wont take responsibility for their actions. #momsterslink

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    1. Yep it’s here in the states too. The problem is so many parents are afraid to discipline their children for fear their kids will think their “mean” But when they get older they realize you were being mean you were teaching them respect and to behave! Thanks for linking up!

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  11. I love how you say it like it is. When there are so many parents whining about life and making their failings someone else’s fault, how are their children meant to know any better? I totally agree that these parents need to step up if they think the school is that bad. Yes, there are rubbish teachers out there (I know I had a few, but looking back, the teachers I maybe didn’t like as much were the ones who were the best teachers and the “nice” ones the not so good ones!) but ultimately, as a parent you have to take responsibility for raising your child. Thanks for hosting #momsterslink
    Debbie

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  12. I think there are parents who become detached from their children and expect the teachers to do all the hard work, I agree with you – parents should be parents and get involved and know what is going on in their kids live. Great post.
    #momsterslinkup

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  13. i agree with the things your saying. It can be really hard as a mother to see children going through difficult times whether it is bullying online or outside. For us my daughter has been getting called a “sloppy dog” and pushed around by other kids. They always choose her to pick on and it upsets her and she comes home crying. I decided enough is enough and she is not going to play with those children. I am teaching her to stand up for herself but i also need to protect her from too much bullying. Its hard and sad and a learning curve for me!

    Angela x

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    1. There are always going to be mean kids. I grew up surrounded by mean girls but I look back on it and them now and realize that they never were and never will be…anything. That’s hard to understand when you are younger but I just try to explain it the best way I know how to my kids. Hope you find peace with your daughter and the mean girls.

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  14. OMG! We think so much alike! I am right there with you! I love my kids’ schools but I do still sometimes have disagreements with them and I do address those issues with them. It has never once dawned on me NOT TO. I’m the parent and my opinion and knowledge of my children is important so I will voice my concerns whenever my kids come home with an issue. The teachers are awesome though and are willing to listen to me. I love that we bounce ideas off each other. As for the bullying, the internet is where most of the bullying is occurring these days and you are so right about getting them off the internet. My boys are on social media (except YouTube and they use my account for that). They are not ready but I also have conversations with them about social media and letting them know that not everyone online is going to be nice. I teach them how to handle that. Our job as parents isn’t just to coddle them and love them until they’re grown then unleash them onto the world with no knowledge on how the world works. They won’t succeed that way. We have to prepare them and teach them resilience to face adversity that they will surely face as they get older. Thanks for the post! Love it!

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    1. Thank you Michelle! I really don’t coddle my kids unless they get hurt. Sure we have nights that we snuggle up and watch a movie or if they have a bad dream I go in and lay with them until they are back to sleep and ok. But for the most part I want them to understand to depend on themselves. I want to raise independent children. Not in a hard ass way but rather explaining things in a language they understand. Thanks so much for taking the time to read and leave an awesome comment!

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  15. I seem to be having trouble with comments…mine are disappearing and I can’t reply to the ones on my site!! Anyway off track…the point is i’m here commenting again, so if you get me twice that’s why!
    I think this is a really interesting post. I think that parents should trust in schools and teachers but that’s not to say there won’t be problems or things that the parents aren’t happy with…in which case a dialogue with the teachers is, I would think, the best bet. They are our peers but sometimes it seems people I know regress to being the schoolchild they once were around them!
    My toddler is a toddler so I am not speaking from experience and have all this to come!
    THanks for hosting #momsterslink x

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    1. I have a teen who handles stuff very well and pretty much just stays away from the “bad” kids but yes I have 3 little ones who will all be in the school system in 2 years. Thanks for linking up and I hope you fix the commenting glitch. Try logging out of your account and log back in

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  16. Hi Trista, It is a real fine line to walk as a parent. We want to teach our children to respect themselves and others and we want them to understand about fairness but also we want them to realise that things are not always fair, bounce back and stand up for them selves. For me this all boils down to helping them understand that they are fundamentally okay no matter what happens around them.

    We can cause our children problems by giving them unrealistic expectations of the world or letting them see us always feeling hard done by. Oh for a manual on raising kids!! Kirsten

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    1. I agree. I just always want them to feel like they don’t need to always care what others think about them but to still be kind and help someone when they need it…I told my son if someone is picking on a kid don’t join forces with the mean kid but become friends with the picked on kid instead. It’s a hard parenting gig I tell you! Thanks for reading and commenting Kirsten

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    1. It really is concerning to me that so many parents in my little community had so much negativity to say…luckily they were from years ago and since then some things have changed. Just think kids nee to be more involved with what’s going on with their kids. Thanks so much for hosting!

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  17. I cant wait to have a teen! Not! I wonder what kind of children I am raising when my child shouts at me “mummy you forgot my spoon you idiot!” Hold on what did you just say!!! She didnt get it from me honest :-/ some valid points you raise about social media!

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  18. Finally getting to my weekly linky reading – so glad I got to yours this week. I friggin couldn’t agree more. I get so sick of parents who whinge and say the teacher doesnt do this and the ‘teacher should be doing this. Go in talk to them – see if they know your child and what the plan is. I have had my fair share of not so great teachers along the way but unless I had spoken to them, to judge for myself what to believe from my kids and what to ignore – I would not have been able to follow it up and get change happening. There have also been years where I have said the kids we just gotta suck this up until the year is over. If you don’t like it you can always move (but generally wherever the whingers are – they wouldn’t be happy). Mel xx #AnythingGoes

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    1. Our son that decided to go live with his biological mom was always complaining about some teacher or that everything was some teachers fault yet when we would go talk to the teacher come to find out he was acting out the same way he would at home and I’d be pissed too if I was the teacher. So many parents think their kids could do no wrong yet 80 percent of the kids I see running around have no respect for anyone. Thanks for taking time to read and comment Mel!

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  19. I totally agree with the social media bit. Even with adults, some people get so hung up on what happens on Facebook or the like it ruins their lives, just get off the internet! We all need to raise our children to be responsible, respectful and intelligent individuals who know how to act properly.
    #AnythingGoes

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    1. I have taken a bit of a hiatus from Facebook except for promoting my blog only cause I was so tired of all the whining or people that never post and then when they do it was a bitch about drama session …I just check my close friends posts and get off it

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  20. Can I tell you how many times I have tried to comment on here and it wont go through! Weird! I tried a few times on my phone and now I’m on the laptop. Anyway, I have so much respect for teachers! They work so hard and so many are under appreciated. My mom always told me that you need to volunteer and be present at school in order for your voice to be heard. I also think parents need to be more present in the lives of their children (even if they are sitting right there parents can be totally checked out), engage them more and get back to the basics of teaching manners. Good post. I’m stopping by from #momsterslink a million years ago. :-p Cheers!

    Fingers crossed this goes through!

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    1. lol…yes there are days I could use some of that advice myself. I get busy and give my kids something to “focus their attention” off me so that I can get some stuff done…some weeks this happens more then others but I plan to always be involved with my kids and school. If my kids come home complaining too much of something in particular then you better believe I will get to the bottom of it. Thanks for popping over…sorry you had so many issues trying to leave a comment.

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      1. I get like that too especially if I’m trying to do blogging stuff while everyone is home needing me, “all up in my grill” lol! It makes me feel incredibly frustrated because then I feel like I can’t ever get anything done which makes me loose my patience more with them. I’m actually slowing down a bit on the blogging for now because of that. It hasn’t been good for any of us! So I’ll just write when I can. But that’s easier said than done. Hope you’re good my friend!

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