paranoia strangers danger parenting daughters

Am I Paranoid?

paranoia strangers danger parenting daughters

My 4 and 6 year old both started wrestling season last week.  It’s so cute to watch the younger sister wanting to keep up with her bigger brother who is a year older than her and did wrestling last year.  This is her first year.

I have to take my 3 year old along as well which is fine other than tonight she kept wanting to run up and down this hallway area.  I let her, but explained to her that I just wanted to be able to see her and not to be trying to hide behind stuff.

Soon after, a mother and her son who I would say was about the age of 10 showed up and sat down next to me.  Her son then decided to wonder down the same hallway in which my daughter was playing in.  The hallway was not really well lit and there were places in parts of the walls that he decided to hide, lurk or whatever he was doing.

My daughter was insistent that she wanted to “play” with the boy but the problem with me was that I couldn’t see him at all and could barely see her.  So I called her back to me.  I explained to her that the boy was much older than she was and that he wasn’t at an age that she would have anything in common with him.  She looked at me kind of confused which is totally understandable.

I asked her what she was talking to the boy about and she told me she was telling him about her unicorn and her house and various other things.  But as a mother of a girl, 2 girls actually, all I kept thinking was that this boy, who was lurking where I couldn’t see him… what if he was up to no good?  Does that make me paranoid?

I just had this really weird vibe and I have always been one to never doubt my instincts.

Things can happen so quickly.  So quickly that I couldn’t even watch my other two kids wrestle because this boy, that was hiding where I couldn’t see him, was seemingly calling my daughter over there as she would run up and down the hallway.  Why?  Not to mention he kept peeking out from behind whatever it was he was hiding behind as if he was continuously checking to see if I was watching.  And I was watching…like a hawk.

I hate the fact that I really don’t trust people.  Because I feel that the moment you put your guard down is when something happens.

Maybe that boy was just hiding from his mother…maybe every time he peeked out from behind the wall he was seeing if his mother was watching and not me…I don’t know…but I didn’t trust the situation and went with trusting my instincts instead.

What do you think you would have done?

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Published by

DomesticatedMomster

I am a mother of 5, a wife to 1, and a fully certified domesticated momster who likes to blog about motherhood, marriage, and anything else that pops into my crazy head all with a side of sarcasm and a glass of wine.

33 thoughts on “Am I Paranoid?”

  1. I would have been paranoid too. Big boys around little girls and they are acting funny would send red flags up all over my mind. I am paranoid about my little boy playing with my little girl because he can be a little rough naturally. You’re not wrong for thinking he was up to no good.

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    1. I live in such a small town and pretty much you see the same people everywhere. Especially when it comes to kids sports events. But I had never seen the mother or her son and like I said …. it was a vibe that just immediately went off and as a mother I always go with my instincts.

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  2. That’s a tough situation to be in and I’ve been in similar circumstances. When my boys were 3, I wouldn’t let them play with older kids either. In fact, I don’t let my nine year old play with older kids, unless they are family that I trust. He has his older brother and two older cousins that I trust. All of them are teenagers but do you think I would let him play with teenagers I don’t know and trust? Absolutely not! You’re right, the boy could have very well been just playing. At 10 years old, developmentally speaking, he’s still just a kid but these days, kids seem to be doing so much more than we did at that age and the fact that his mother was probably not watching him, would make me paranoid. As I said, my youngest is 9 and I don’t let him out of my site when we are in public. There’s still too much that could go wrong. Now that I think of it, that might make me more paranoid than you because I won’t let my older kid out of my site. LOL! I was much worse when they were small though but still, over protective mama right here! I can’t help it. I know what’s out there and clearly, so do you. I say you’re not paranoid, you’re just protective:)

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  3. Tough situation. Better safe than sorry. I had a conversation with a friend of mine about her 7 year old niece and her predatory sexual tendencies towards her 5 year old. That conversation gave me the chills and as a parent you should be an advocate of your children regardless of how it makes others feel.

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    1. Both my girls are completely opposite …my 4 year old probably would have given him a dirty look and walked off but my 3 year old will talk to anyone who talks to her regardless of how much I have had the talk with her about strangers. I often understand why they say to never mess with a mother bears cubs.

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  4. I would be completely the same – I think we all become a little paranoid when we have children, and that’s ok. We have such a strong need to protect them, even though our rational selves are saying, ‘it’s probably nothing’, our urge to make absolutely sure just takes over.

    It’s tough and sometimes I worry people will think I am crazy but ultimately I prefer the peace of mind I get from being extra careful.

    That might become more difficult as they get older. Hey, we can all be paranoid together.
    #abitofeverything

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    1. I live in a very small town and I use that as a crutch sometimes as I see little kids no older than probably 5 or 6 riding their bikes or walking home from school but I just can’t imagine letting mine out of my site for that long (except for school of course). I just feel the need to protect them and watch over them as long as possible. Thanks for popping over and taking a read 💌Trista, Domesticated Momster

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  5. Things are so very different today then they used to be. It’s sad, but you really can’t trust anyone when it comes to your littles. I totally agree with how you handled the situation and kudos to you for trusting your instincts!

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  6. Ugh, what a difficult situation! I also really hate being paranoid or too overprotective, but you’reminded right, when you let your guard down is when something happens. I don’t want to live in fear, but I would never forgive myself if something were to happen to my daughter. I would replay the moment for the rest of my life. So in my opinion, better safe than sorry!

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  7. It’s really difficult isn’t it when you feel uneasy in a situation like that. I don’t think it’s being paranoid. Sometimes situations do feel uncomfortable around kids and you do just have to go with your gut. I know exactly what you mean #abitofeverything

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  8. I would have done what you have, trust my own instincts and do what feels right at the moment. I think it’s always easier to discount or think otherwise on hindsight. Thanks for sharing with #abitofeverything

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    1. I don’t regret doing what I did. I didn’t know that boy or his mother and the fact the mother really wasn’t paying attention to where he was or what he was doing made it even easier for me to make that call. Thanks for hostessing lovely! 💌Trista

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  9. Trust your gut is all I can say if it didn’t feel right then you did the best thing. I think as parents we do develop a certain amount of worry and paranoia seems to go along with it. I would have done the same thing as you! Thanks for linking up #bestandworst

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  10. oh I hear this! I trust no one and its sad really… its just you see so much stuff on the news and papers and everywhere that it just makes it super difficult to have any faith in anyone. It does cause issues though with my teen because we are so overprotective, when really, she should be allowed the same privileges as I had when I was growing up, but – and Im going to sound old here – the world really IS a different place. Kids are getting stabbed and beaten up left right and centre for no reason what so ever and that terrifies me, so I just insist that I drop her to places instead of letting her get the bus etc – I know its bad but if anything happened and I could have prevented it with my over protective ways then I would never forgive myself. I should try to not see/think the worst, but I would have done exactly what you did.. even though it probably was innocent, but… how do we know?! oh I could go on all day about this, but I’ll stop lol 🙂

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    1. I really am over protective when it comes to my girls … They are so young and innocent that they don’t quite yet know how cruel the world is. And as for when they become teenagers I just don’t think I will ever be prepared for that. Like you said “the world really IS a different place”. Thanks for popping over and commenting 😉

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