bitch attitude witch personality grumpy daily writing prompt

Shape Up Or Ship Out

The Daily Post Writing Prompt

“Write a letter to the personality trait you like least, convincing it to shape up or ship out. Be as threatening, theatrical, or thoroughly charming as is necessary to get the job done.”



Dear Bitch,

Yes I am talking to you.  The bitch, witch, shrew, she-devil, that lurks around in my head daily and often shows herself to anyone in an ears distance that has done anything remotely maddening irritating to awaken her.

For instance when the husband is chewing…in the same way he has chewed for the past 38 years of his life.  Or perhaps when he falls asleep before me and snores to the point that not only can I not get to sleep but it’s the one and only thing I can focus on.  And why does miss bitch need to come out when I get into the truck to find that he still hasn’t put air in the tires from the last time I drove the truck?  Why?  Is this really a reason to get bitchy?

What about when the kids are all getting on each others nerves and then getting on mommy’s nerves and guess who shows up?  Yep…the bitch.

bitch bitchiness attitude quote
Or how about when I have just got done scrubbing the girls bathroom only to go in there 20 minutes later to find that it looks like it wasn’t even cleaned.

Same goes for their rooms.

Is this really a reason to become a raging lunatic bitch?

No wait, that was when my daughter decided to take the hair brush out of the bathroom and after telling her to put it back, of course she didn’t, and at 7:30pm, after showers, and time to brush hair and go to bed…instead mommy is tearing the house apart looking for the damn brush…see even thinking about it is making mommy bitchy!  Why?  It’s just a brush.

How about when the teenager doesn’t do his chores right?  Rushes through them half- assed and knows that it’s one of his step mother’s biggest pet peeves and a sure fire way to provoke the resting bitch.

bitch sleeping attitude personality grumpy daily writing prompt

Almost daily there is something that makes the bitch in me come out and quite honestly I am rather sick of her.  So I have vowed in 2016 not to be so bitchy.  Has it been working?  Well there are good days and there are bad days…but I am learning not to let the bitch take over the entire day, like I used to let her do.

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I am linking with the following fab linkys…

My Random Musings
Pink Pear Bear
A Bit Of Everything
My Kid Doesn't Poop Rainbows

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I am a mother of 5, a wife to 1, and a fully certified domesticated momster who likes to blog about motherhood, marriage, and anything else that pops into my crazy head all with a side of sarcasm and a glass of wine.

47 thoughts on “Shape Up Or Ship Out”

  1. Ouch! Very entertaining and oh, how I could relate, especially to the chewing! I asked my husband the other day if I made as much noise when I chewed my food. He looked at me like, “Woman, are you for real!?” It was not one of my better days.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Lol. I really am a nice person actually. But I have had friends tell me that when they first met me they thought I would be a bitch. Of course after getting to know me that would change but I hate coming across that way. There’s a fine line between confidence and bitchy. I guess in some cases I own both and in others in this shy introverted girl who’s searching for her peeps.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Here is a little sympathy from the devil. You have to keep in mind that you are aiming to completely reinvent yourself in 2016. You’ve got a long list of things that you are trying to work on. Or at least that’s the outside looking in. Try not to be so hard on yourself because you do have almost 310 days left to make these improvements. You’re trying to eat healthier, not drink, work out regularly so that you can be fit and feel good about yourself. The other side of the coin has to do with that Betty White quote you used. When people annoy you maybe you should just remind yourself to mind your own business even if it is your family. Or stop paying so much attention to them and and turn that energy into refocusing back on your self again. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Remember you’re supposed to be taking things day by day moment by moment. That’s how real change happens.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I have put quite a lot of goals on myself for 2016 but only because this is the first year that I actually feel I can achieve most of them. I have honestly been in a fog for years raising 5 kids. I can finally feel the light and I want to embrace it in every way. As far as other people annoying me well that will probably never change. We are human and annoyance is a trait that comes with being human. I’m just trying to work on not getting so annoyed. Thanks for popping over and saying hello :))


  3. I get bitchy every time my boys leave their dirty dishes or trash by their computers. Yes, I let them eat at their desks because my table is NEVER clean. Even after I clean it, 5 minutes later, it’s a mess again but I have been recruiting the kids to pick up after themselves more because A: They’re old enough and B: I’m tired of doing it. The teenager has gotten better with but the younger one always uses a new dish every time he wants to make cereal. Use the same dish! I get really irritated about that and I am pretty bitchy when I drive but other than that I’m good….Well, depending on the day, lol! #anythinggoes

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    1. My 4 year old likes to change her clothes like 3-4 times a day and she throws the stuff on the floor so I told her that I do her laundry once a week and if she runs out of clothes then she has to pick shit off the floor to wear. She’s a stubborn little thing though. She’d rather wear the clothes off the floor than listen to her mother.

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  4. Oh my bitch comes out with the chewing too, I is called Misophonia. I just feel unbelievably mad when I hear someone chewing. My inner bitch also comes out when the kids leave the plastic covers from drink straws all over the house, bin people and hubby leaves his coat over the back of the dining room chairs or his shoes in the middle of the floor. Having a hysterectomy really made me reevaluate though and like you I am learning to let go but still have moments of pure bitch. Loved this post. Sorry for my mega long comment!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I love long comments! And yes my husband actually had the nerve to look up Misophonia and told me that I’m psychological …well duh! I already knew that lol. It seriously drives me batty! Our teenage son does it too and now he has braces and it’s even worse! It’s hard to keep the inner bitch at bay sometimes but hey we’re trying!


  5. Good luck keeping your inner bitch under control in 2016! I was just trying to think whether I had a problem with my inner bitch, when my husband asked me for to check for information about a race he’s running in the weekend. Then I remembered my inner bitch comes out when he doesn’t bother to look for or find out things for himself. Oops!

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    1. I hate when my husband does that. Like he will be watching tv, phone sitting right next to him, and I will be busy blogging, which yes I think is more important than the television, and he will say to look something up cause I’m already on the computer. I feel the steak escaping from my head just thinking about it lol.


  6. Oh, dear friend, I can totally relate! And it’s so much worse when I’ve got a lot of things on my mind. Like you, I have my good and bad days. I also think that all the silly little things we deal with- snoring, lost items, etc. build up and eventually we just become irritated wth everything. I’ve been working on my patience lately as a well. Feel free to reach out if you’re having a particularly bitchy day! We can vent!! xx #AnythingGoes

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  7. I have a terrible inner bitch too, I call her monster mum. Most of the time I’m laid back mum, and then out of nowhere she’ll rear her ugly head and I hear her horrible whiny voice coming out of my mouth – yuck! Trying to squish her down as much as I can, but crikey, it’s hard! #bigpinklink

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    1. Oh teenagers just have no clue. I remember being one and thinking that I had the answers to everything. I didn’t have a clue. We all learn about life at some point. I will be honest…I am not looking forward to having 3 teenagers all a year apart in the future. My girls are 11 months apart …oi!


  8. Eeeek!!! I think I have the Twin here at my place! I was just thinking about writing about her as well..Love the way you write and what a great perspective to write to your trait as if it was a trait. Sorry but I had to laugh along as well. #mg

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Me and my inner bitch are going rounds with one another these days. I truly am trying to keep her at bay more and breathe before I blow. Sometimes that may require shutting myself in the bathroom with the door locked and I am not even having to use the throne but to sit on and think.


      1. Look at my stupid typo- meant to say “write to your trait as if it was a person”… I try the same but I usually try to bribe mine with chocolate and cake and then she’s happy and then she blows when I step on the scales the next morning. Can never win with her! Yep, shutting yourself away would be a good idea! Back from #abitofeverything

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  9. I think it’s really hard to be a SAH mom – especially with lots of little kids close in age. And, if you’re a mom who likes things tidy & to cook homemade foods, then you are a mom who takes a lot of pride in her house & health of her family. It’s frustrating when things don’t go how you’d like them to & when things get undone minutes after doing them. After a long, frustrating& thankless day, the hubby is the likely victim to take out the frustrations on. I know just how you feel & I too have been trying to stay more positive. It doesn’t happen every day but it’s a good feeling when it does. Don’t be too hard on yourself – that’s my friend you are talking about!! #MG :)xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The people we live with take the most of the brunt because well we are around each other all the time. I would probably never speak to a friend the way I speak to my husband sometimes. But yes you are so right that when you take pride in your family it gets frustrating when things don’t quite go the way you wanted them to. Thanks for popping over :))

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  10. This is such a good idea! I have an inner monster that is often provoked by the silliest of things. I can also be difficult, if not impossible to nudge out of a bad mood. Which I hate, especially when I’d really like to back down myself! The things that drive me insane are similar to yours, except it isn’t so much directed at my husband. Except when he lets the dog in with muddy paws on freshly washed floors. Then I could cheerfully commit a murder!! 😉 Thanks so much for linking up again! #bigpinklink

    Liked by 1 person

  11. A brutally honest post. The bitch in all of us escapes every now and then. It’s hard to control those emotions when things fire us up so much. Good luck taming your firery dragon. #AnythingGoes

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I really used to let her ruin my entire day. But now I have found if I just step back, take a little breather, sometimes pop on some Zumba on the ol YouTube…seems to work. And sometimes it’s just straight for the wine or vodka that works best. Nothing pisses me off after a glass or 3 of an alcoholic beverage lol.


  12. Brilliant post!!

    I’m trying to control my inner bitch, not as a New Years resolution….Its just that even I found her too bitchy at times; never a good thing. Counting to ten isn’t working, so when you find the solution let me know.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s called wine…sometimes vodka…cause yeah counting to 10 surely doesn’t work and neither does saying the alphabet. But I have found that locking myself in the toilet room with a nice cold glass of “mommy” juice seems to do the trick.


  13. haha oh my gosh so funny, I love the quote!!!! This is classic, you are right it is just a hairbrush but why do they always go missing!!???? I think that bitch lives a little in all of us lol #mg

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I wonder sometimes if my neighbors can hear me and what they must think when raging bitch mode comes out. Sometimes it will be first thing in the morning in the garage trying to get everyone ready for the school run. She just rears her ugly head without giving a second thought to whose listening or watching. Thanks for hostessing!


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