girl in window voice abuse neglect motherhood

The Girl In The Window With No Voice

Daily Writing Prompt

girl in window voice abuse neglect motherhood

Lately I have been reading a lot of articles and blog posts about mothers feeling like they are failing at motherhood.  Myself included.

A couple months ago I came across a story about a little girl in the window of a rental house, who some neighbors, that thought no children lived in the house, one day saw the girl peaking out the window.

Sometimes stories stick with you…and you can’t let go of them….this is one of those stories.

The couple who saw the little girl in the window luckily reported it to the police for they had never seen a child and thought that it was only a man, woman, and 2 adult sons that lived in the rental property across the street.

You can read about the rest of the story here.  Please be advised it is a horrible story and one that may stick with you like it has with me.  It would have taken a lot of strength, as the cop who had to enter those premises, not to punch that woman in the face.

The point is, that us mothers that think  we are failing because we had a bad day and yelled at the kids, or we let Netflix babysit for the day so we could get some stuff done.  Even if that stuff getting done meant taking time to ourselves to read a book, blog, exercise, or whatever it may be.

Even if we fed the kids mac and the cheese (it’s what my kids call it) and hot dogs for dinner with slices of cucumbers as a veggie because we just didn’t feel like being in the kitchen for two hours only to hear…”I don’t like this, I want mac and the cheese”.  Even when we take a timeout in the bathroom for 30 minutes and tell the kids we are pooping and to go play.

When we let our kids go to school in mix matched clothes because we don’t feel like fighting at 6:30am about what they are going to wear so we just say fu*k it and let them wear what they want.

Any of those times.

We are still being mothers who love our children.  Who dress our children.  Bathe our children.  Feed our children.  LOVE our children and show that love by hugging them and kissing them and telling them daily that we love them.  Let me assure you …. you aren’t failing and if you think you are then I encourage you to read the story about the little girl in the window.  Because that mother…doesn’t deserve to be called a mother at all.  Yes I am sure she probably had some kind of mental issues but what about the man that lived there or the two grown sons?  Where were their voices?  Why didn’t they speak up?  Were they all just crazy?

There is also a follow up to the story, 9 years later, about the little girl and the courageous family who insisted on adopting her, even knowing the challenges that they would face,  and how they are coping.  You can read that here.

So all you mothers out there that think you aren’t doing it right…if your child is loved…pat yourself on the back…you’re doing it right.

From One Mother To Another,

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DomesticatedMomster

I am a mother of 5, a wife to 1, and a fully certified domesticated momster who likes to blog about motherhood, marriage, and anything else that pops into my crazy head all with a side of sarcasm and a glass of wine.

35 thoughts on “The Girl In The Window With No Voice”

  1. This is an amazing post because we do need to remember that taking a moment for ourselves is OK. 15 minutes of Netflix isn’t going to ruin a child’s life! Completely agree. Let’s remind ourselves we are actually very good Mothers. : )

    Liked by 2 people

  2. It’s very easy to look at other women and think their succeeding in where you think you have failed.
    Their families are publicly happy and appear from the outside, to be very open about the charms of their domestic life.
    But every family has their secrets, and even those that appear the happiest to others could share privately that theirs isn’t what they made it to be.
    Of the divorces I’ve seen, they’ve all come from the least expected source. I encourage families to not judge their private life on what they think of others; everyone has their secrets, all relationships have their upsides too.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh I totally agree! I often think the ones who appear to be the most perfect are the ones with the biggest secrets….like the Duggars from TLC reality show. There’s a perfect example of what looks perfect on the outside is totally corrupted behind closed doors!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. You are a amazing writer, I truly enjoy reading your blogs. Thank you for the truths, the laughs and your time to us readers! Being a mother is job no one can truly appreciate until you become one.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Oh gosh I hate these kind of stories although I read them because I believe that every story deserves to be told. It’s just awful though isn’t it how any parent could treat a child that way. I feel like a bad Mummy most days and yet I love my children with every fibre of my being and that’s all that really matters. Thanks for sharing, and for hosting. #momsterslink

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, it’s a really hard story to read…that’s why I put the warning on it. It has stuck with me since the day I read it. But the update is good and that family deserves a medal for enduring all they have to show and teach her love and life. Thanks for linking up!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. That story, it is so hard to read. It makes me want to go and wake the kids and give them a cuddle. No matter what, a mums job is to protect you little ones. How could you do anything but. The family that took her in…what amazing good hearted people. #momsterslink

    Liked by 1 person

    1. They are amazing human beings and puts my faith back into humanity. I want to read the book. I want to know more about what was wrong with the mother. It’s just a story that I can’t let go of for some reason. I can’t get my head around her going unnoticed for soooo long. Thanks for linking, reading, and commenting :))

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I’ve just clicked the link and read the story and I’m sick to my stomach. I’m horrified for this poor little girl and actually feel relieved to come back to the ‘safety’ of your post. Thank you for sharing her story, and for giving us mums a virtual hug. After that I needed it.

    Thanks for hosting #momsterslink xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Did you read the follow up? She will never fully recover but kudos to that family who have stuck through the struggles and given her love and affection. I hugged my babies tight after reading that story. It’s hard to believe she went so long without anyone seeing her in the window. Thanks so much for linking up and taking the time to read and comment :))

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree. There are nights though that I tuck my kids in and I think about all the kids whose parents aren’t tucking them in, or hugging them, or telling them that they love them, and it really makes me sad. But I can’t fix the world…I can only do my part.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. “So all you mothers out there that think you aren’t doing it right…if your child is loved…pat yourself on the back…you’re doing it right.”

    brilliant post, so many women feel this way. I wasnt brace enough to read the rest of the story.
    Thankyou for linking up #modernmummonthly

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I love this Trista & thank you! I have been feeling guilty about blogging too much some days. I took the whole weekend off & it was glorious. But I agree if we do the best for our kids, love them & care of them then we are good moms. There has to be room for ourselves in the equation too. Oh my goodness, I just read the two posts about the girl in the window & I found an update video on Oprah – what an absolutely horrifying story! The poor child It’s unimaginable!! It’s wonderful that she was adopted & being looked after but the permanent damage to her is just horrifying. 😦

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes there’s actually a book that I intend to download. I want to hear more about the moms background. I just can’t seem to let go of this story. I can’t imagine what would have happened had the neighbors not noticed her in the window. So yes on days I’m feeling like a bad mom I totally remember that my children are loved, held, fed, clothed, bathed, SEE THE SUNSHINE! And even my getting upset with them is still being a mother raising my kids to be good citizens. Thanks for popping over :))

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Thank you Trista for sharing this little girl’s story! Child abuse is more common than people think and yet so many kids go unnoticed and when they do get noticed, the “help” they receive doesn’t help them at all. I’m glad the little girl was rescued and a big Kudos to the adoptive parents for dedicating their lives to helping this little girl and loving her. I read her story and watched the video. The article did say that the mother had a very low IQ, which makes sense when reading her response to the questions as to why Danielle wasn’t was potty-trained or even fed. I hope Danielle continues to improve as she grows and I have such a deep respect for the adoptive parents who just really love her and dedicate their lives to her. Thanks for sharing this Trista! Popping over from #bloggerclubuk

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    1. I really want to read the book. I had to guess that the mother had a low IQ but there was also a husband and two older brothers. It’s just one of those stories that I haven’t stopped thinking about since I first read about it. But I really posted it not only for others to know the story but for us mommies who are so hard on ourselves when it comes to taking care of our kids to know that even on our bad days…our kids are loved, fed, clothed, held, and it’s ok that we yell sometimes or take time outs in the bathroom to cry it out because it’s still part of loving them.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. This is a lovely post, I think most parents will feel affinity with it I nodded with the netflix part, I fet ill the other day so we just curled up and watched a film. My head kept telling me I needed to do more to engage him, draw, walk anything but spongebob..I think the trouble is no one tells you you are a good parent often enough we have no specific standard for what we are reaching for..so we keep reaching and keep berating ourselves. I think the fact we love them anough to worry that much shows we are awesome. xx #Bloggerclubuk

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Exactly! Parenting is a tough job but as long as you are loving them, feeding them, bathing them, and just being a parent that is present…we are allowed to have bad days or lazy days. Doesn’t make us bad parents. Thanks for popping over and commenting!

      Liked by 1 person

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