Before I became a mother, people used to always say “you’ll feel differently about your own kids than you do about other people’s kids”. There couldn’t be a more truthful statement.
There was a time in my life that I never really wanted kids. Partly because I couldn’t tolerate other people’s kids. Sure I had plenty of friends with kids and there were times I would babysit and at one time I even had a friend and her child living with me. I was around those kids a lot, got used to them, and grew to love them and understand their behaviors. They were good kids.
Then I would come across kids that weren’t so good. Whether it was they whined too much, threw too many tantrums, talked back to their parents, or just seemed to not have any discipline WHAT. SO. EVER. I used to dread when I would get a walk-in client and they had their kids with them (they were usually already throwing a tantrum before they even took a seat) because inevitably this meant that it was going to take me twice as long to do my job. Let’s face it, kids aren’t going to sit and be quiet for an hour while you get your nails done.
Now I know that my kids aren’t perfect, and probably get on most people’s nerves, as there are three of them and because they are so close in age they are usually all doing the same thing and making lots of noise while doing it.
And if someone were to tell me that my kids were a lot to handle, I would in no way be offended…I would most likely nod and agree. But I am used to them. And usually have a tendency to get loud and obnoxious with them. Because they are my kids.
I think that these days we live in a society that has us programmed that disciplining our kids is somehow going to f*ck them up in the head. Bullshit.
There are people who think that spanking your kids on the ass is a form of abuse. Bullshit.
There are too many people running around trying to be the “cool” parents instead of saying “NO” and dealing with their kids being pissed off at them. Trust me, they will get over it and talking with your kids and explaining things goes a long way.
I think it’s important that when you feel your kids are old enough and mature enough to understand the evil in the world, to explain it to them. I think my friend Michelle at Rockin Random Mom did that best and explained it in her post about the Brock Turner Story.
This story is a perfect example of a spoiled brat whose father I am quite certain reached deep into his pockets and placed a large amount of money in that greedy judge’s hands. In case you have been living under a rock you can read about the story here.
It’s just one of the many articles stirring the internet these days.
I have heard people talk about how they teach their kids respect yet I watch them disrespect their parents and the parents sadly don’t correct the behavior. Teaching them please, thank you, yes sir, no ma’am is all great but if they are then acting out at you, the parent, and you aren’t correcting it, then it’s pretty much pointless.
If they are throwing a temper tantrum because you told them NO and you coddle them instead of taking action…guess what? Your kid just might turn out to be the next Brock Turner.
Sometimes kids need to learn lessons and not have their parents always bailing them out of these situations. When a child, whether that child be a toddler, young child, pre-tween, tween, or teenager and they do something wrong it’s our job as parents to correct the problem not ignore it and let them continue to believe it’s ok to behave that way.
And when they are good I also believe in rewarding good behavior. It goes both ways.
Now please note that all these opinions of raising kids are those of my own and how you choose to raise your kids is completely up to you. But remember, someday they are going to be adults, making choices, and the better influence you had on them the better adults they will become.
Well unless they are just born with a bad gene … because I do believe too, that some human’s brains are just wired differently and you could be the best parent possible and they could still be a part of the majority of messed up individuals living in society. Take the Duggers of “19 Kids And Counting” as a perfect example of that. Of course the first time I ever watched that show I knew that mother was just WAAAAAAY to happy. No one has that many kids and is that happy. Seriously.
To All The Good Parents Out There **salutes you**
I am linking this post with the following fabulous linkys…