My Decision To Circumcise 

Even though my son is now almost 7 years old,  it is still a frequent discussion between my husband and I why I made the decision to circumcise our son.  My husband believes that there is no reason for males to be circumcised and I felt that I didn’t want him growing up having to deal with society’s idea of what most penises look like.

Circumcision reasons pros cons
I remember the day like it was yesterday.  Since my husband was against circumcision (he is circumcised but says he was never given a choice) he refused to go with me.  This was my first baby and here I was going to a life changing doctor’s appointment all by myself.

I sat in the examining room going through my head a hundred times and wondering if I was making the right decision.  Honestly I made the decision to have my son circumcised based solely on the fact that society has decided on this procedure to be completely normal and is no longer based on religion or faith but that of cosmetics.

As a woman, I have seen both types of penises and have talked to various other women who have as well.  And the sad fact is that the majority of women prefer a circumcised penis over that of one that is not.  According to the popular adult store, Adam & Eve, over 54% of women prefer a circumcised penis.  But I also found in my research that circumcision rates increased from 48% during 1988–1991 to 61% during 1997–2000 but declined to 56% in 2008 according to the CDC.  The results from the Adam & Eve survey were done in 2014.

They took my son into another room to do the procedure while I waited in the examination room.  It seemed like hours passed when finally they brought him in.  The doctor removed his diaper to show me what he had done and to say what I saw was anything short of horrific,is an understatement.  No one had prepared me for the dark red flesh that was now at the end of my little baby boy’s penis.  I felt like a horrible mother and began uncontrollably crying.  To the point that the doctor had me sit down and relax before going over the after care with me, or even giving me back my baby.

Circumcision reasons pros cons
I finally pulled myself together because I wanted nothing more than to hold and soothe my crying little boy.  The moment he was in my arms I felt a wave of relief come over me.

The doctor explained the after care to me and I hung on every word that escaped from that man’s mouth.  They told me I could stay in the room as long as I needed until I felt comfortable enough to leave.  I remember just sitting there nursing him until finally he was sound asleep.

I gathered up our things and left the hospital.  But as soon as I got him safely loaded into the car (still sleeping) I sat in the parking lot and cried and continued to cry all the way home.  Questioning myself over and over again if I had done the right thing.

I never did any kind of research before the procedure but I made sure to follow the doctors instructions thoroughly.  As each day passed the wound began to heal and quite honestly I thankfully never had any problems and my son never showed any signs of discomfort as described in this article I came across in doing some research for this post.  Had I have read that article before making my own decision, I probably would have decided differently.

Circumcision facts reasons
But then I found a more recent article which you can read here that makes me feel as if I did make the right decision.  I would never want my son to feel like, I am sure some of the men who are talked about in this article, must have felt.  Not to mention I wouldn’t want to be having to constantly be telling him, let alone showing him, how to pull the foreskin back and clean it.  Let’s face it, children (especially boys) don’t care much about their hygiene until far into their teen years when usually they get their first real girlfriend.  The CDC has also stated that several types of research have documented that male circumcision significantly reduces the risk of men contracting HIV through penile-vaginal sex.

In all honesty, as a parent, I think it is a personal choice unless of course it falls under your religion or faith.   But I would like to hear from the women out there what their views are…my main question being…

Do you prefer a man who is circumcised or uncircumcised?   And if you feel like it, please do explain.

Domesticated Momster
The Secret Diary of Agent Spitback

65 comments

  1. Hello, my son is not circumsized, but that is due to him being premature, 7 weeks early, and having complications. He was a bleeder, and the doctors didn’t feel comfortable doing the procedure until he was over a year old, and by that point I felt very uncomfortable about doing that. I am personally for having it done, but for hygienic reasons. My son’s father is circumcised, but wasn’t at birth. He decided to have it done when he was 24 years old! I know right?! And it was a very painful process for him. I will admit at times that I wish my son was circumcised though, he has gotten numerous yeast infections from not pulling his foreskin back when he pees or when he showered. He is now 11 and has gotten a lot better about that. But i still worry that the boys will make fun of him in PE in the locker rooms. He started middle school this year, so I dread that it’s coming. I’ve decided though that if he wants to have the procedure done, then I will pay for it. I think both being uncircumsized and circumsize have positive and negative points, we as parents just have to weigh them out and do what we feel is best. I don’t think there is any right or wrong answer on this one.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I actually decided to write this post after watching an episode of one of my favorite shows in which a young man’s girlfriend wouldn’t give him oral because he wasn’t circumcised and so he decided to have it done. Your husband was brace having it done at 24 but hopefully was under anesthesia. Most babies are not and therefore we will never know the true pain it causes as they of course don’t remember as they get older. I too had all the same worries as you when trying to make my decision. There probably isn’t a right or wrong answer … I was just curious about preference as I couldn’t find a lot of recent information on it. Thanks for reading and commenting :))

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  2. I have heard some men say they feel they were robbed of potential length because they were circumcised 😂 But I definitely prefer circumsicised. I have little experience with non , so I guess because it’s more common to me to see one that has been ,I feel more comfortable “handeling” it that way 😜

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Did you check out the article of women who were talking about foul smell and vomiting while performing oral on an uncircumcised penis that I listed in the post? I’ve only been with one and I just remember thinking it looked like an anteater. I never got down there to smell it and it was covered with a condom so I can’t say I felt any difference. My husband says he was robbed of phenomenal orgasms 😂 and that how would us women feel having our clits removed??? He’s just a bit over dramatic 🙄

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  3. As a nurse, it was a matter of health and hygiene for me when I had my son circumcised. We did it in the hospital at 1 day old however, Doctor assured us he would have no memory of it and crying would only be for a minute. My husband (at the time) went with him, he felt it was his duty. And honestly as soon as it was done and Keith picked him up he was fine. I’ve seen some horrific situations with uncircumcised penises as a nurse, both hygienic and physical complications due to nurses/caregivers not knowing proper care with uncircumcised men. For example, to insert a catheter we have to pull the foreskin back, but then MUST put it back….COMPLETELY over the head. If not, the foreskin then becomes like a tourniquet and the head begins to swell, in some cases I’ve seen 10x the normal size. Then it’s impossible to return the foreskin back over the head and a urologist has to basically what I would call butterfly the foreskin. Not a pretty sight, and I’ve assisted in this procedure twice in my 20+ years. But to answer your question (lol) I prefer circumcised because of what I’ve seen hiding under the foreskin of most of the uncircumcised pts I’ve taken care of.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yes, upon doing some of my research for this post I saw some horrific (what looked like infected) penises that weren’t circumcised. I of course wasn’t going to present them in my post but it was probably more horrific then when I first saw my little ones’ after the circumcision. It doesn’t matter what facts I ever present to my husband, he feels I should have never made the choice but I’m glad he allowed me to. I can’t imagine men being older and deciding to have it done. Men are terrified when it comes to anything relating to a surgical instrument and their genitalia 😉 Thank you for reading and leaving a nurses point of view 😊

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  4. I LOVE that you posted about this!

    I’ve never been with an uncircumcised man but sheerly out of visual appeal, I “prefer the look of a circumcised penis.”
    I had my son circ’d and at the time belonged to a Mommy forum. (I know, I know. NO.) I was completely shocked by how many moms said my decision was no different than child abuse. MIND BLOWING that people feel so (psychotically) passionate about a piece of skin.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yes I had a feeling that this might be a controversial post. I have already received a negative comment on my Instagram about it. And of course an argument with my husband 🙄. I feel that when my son is older and he feels I did him wrong then we can discuss my decision at that time. That is completely mind blowing that people would accuse you of child abuse. Pure craziness!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It’s just like the breastfeeding/bottlefeeding controversy. How do people manage to turn feeding a baby into a debate? Ignorant. All I can say on the circ. debate is, I’ve never heard of a boy disowning his mama for circumcising him. I think we’re gonna be just fine. 😉

        Liked by 2 people

      2. Oh I agree. And I’m prepared for that conversation with my son when the time comes. I am surprised how much controversy this post has gotten and how rude some people can be trying to voice their opinions but oh well…I’m tougher than they think and have written some pretty opinionated posts myself 😉 think I might just have to do a follow up to this one.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Honestly, to a UK mummy this is such a bizarre topic. And the reasons behind doing it seem rather shallow if I’m totally honest. But if it’s a customary thing in the U.S then whatever floats your boat.

    I’m not only critiscitsing the mummies that do this, it’s the supposed men and teenage guys that are bullying each other over a foreskin! I think you’d get a smack in this country for owning up to the fact you’ve just looked at ya mates dick! Lol.

    I’m not meaning to put the cat amongst the pigeons but every opinion counts surely. And as for saying that mums who are against it it are psychotical passionate about a piece of skin, the exact same could be said for those who are so obsessed with having it removed.

    Not wishing to start a lengthy debate though. We shall have to agree to disagree.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I was hoping for some controversy on the post. I want to feel what others think and may have to right a follow up post based on my data. In my defense on my decision it was my first child, he was a boy, and all my close friends who were moms had their sons circumcised as well and yes I have heard of ridiculous bullying over boys in PE showers which is just disgraceful. Bullying by any means deserves harsh punishment. Thank you for your honest opinion and please note that I have tough skin and wouldn’t write such a controversial post if I wasn’t prepared for some back lash 😉

      Liked by 1 person

      1. No that’s fair enough. I don’t agree with piercing babies ears either, which is a current debate in the UK at the mo. With calls to ban it until the child is able to consent. I just don’t agree with inflicting any unnecessary pain on children. Aside from vaccinations but then there are plenty of people that would object to that as well. It’s a complex world eh.

        Liked by 2 people

  6. I am expecting a baby boy next year and I definitely will get him circumcised. Not only for cosmetic purposes but for hygiene as well. I’ve been with a man who wasn’t circumcised… let’s just say I prefer a circumcised man lol.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I totally agree. I have gotten some quite controversial comments here and on my Instagram account. One woman who doesn’t even have a boy! I too stand by my decision and if my son, when he is old enough to understand, feels I did something wrong then I am prepared to face that conversation with him. Hell his dad has been so good at preparing me for it lol.

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  7. I have never thought of getting them circumcised because I believed that it is their choice and I do not want to rob them of this right. It is natural and foreskin, yes, it can hide a lot of germs but given the right education to wash, it should be alright.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I truly believe it is all in a parent’s preference and what they feel is right for the child. I have been doing a lot of research and listening to a lot of points of view on the subject. When my son gets older and understands and feels I wronged him then I will deal with that when the time comes. I am prepared for that. Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. I know there are people who say the hygiene issue is myth, but I’ve had daycare babies uncircumcised and it was always a big deal to clean out. None of my circumcised babies ever needed yeast cream for an infection but more than one uncircumcised boys did. I think it really all boils down to the parent and they need to make the best choice for their babies. #bigpinklink

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  9. Whoops. Like I was saying. in these modern days, they have messed up the true meaning of words. For example, the slang ‘A’ word, means some person’s butt, but it really an other name for a donkey. What I am trying to say, is that being circumcised in these days is not the same as being circumcised in, let’s say the 1900’s.

    Here is a task for you, search for a meaning that is different from the ‘being circumcised’ that practically everyone knows. and then let me know what you had found. I am not saying that that I know everything. You are right about the meaning about being circumcised, Moses was circumcised by his own wife (I admit it, it was the circumcised that you talked about), but there is a deeper meaning to being circumcised, and that is what I what you find find out, for yourself. It will, hopefully, not only open your eyes but many others.

    TIP: search in a bible that has not been tampered with. It has been foretold to us, before Joseph Smith was even alive. It has been told to us for about over 1600 years, 200 years since Joseph Smith.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. This is so strange to read because it really isn’t a thing in the UK! I think it happens due to religion & there are other cultures here that do but it’s not the norm at all. It wasn’t ever something that was discussed in baby groups either. Thanks for being a part of the #bigpinklink

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Brave to talk about this! In terms of my preferences:

    Visually: circumcised, hands down
    For oral sex: must be circumcised
    For “regular” sex: doesn’t matter

    At the end of the day it wouldn’t prevent me from sleeping with or dating the right guy, but I have a pretty strong preference for circumcised, and I’ve been with enough of both to have developed an opinion. I also get the impression that most guys would prefer to have been circumcised…I know I would if I were a guy. I’ve never talked to a circumcised guy who regrets it but I know a couple guys who either got circumcised as adults or wish they had been circumcised but were too scared to do it as adults.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yes I would really like to hear from some guys to on this point of view. I have had some controversial comments since posting it but I was expecting that. There’s one person on my Instagram who just won’t let up lol. I’m guessing he’s a guy with an uncircumcised one. Thanks for reading and commenting. Appreciate the input as I’m thinking of doing a follow up post :))

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      1. My perspective, as a guy who *isn’t* circumcised, is that there is no doubt in my mind that I would have any sons of mine circumcised. Like it or not there is a huge stigma against uncircumcised men in this country, and not doing it is going to have repercussions on his sex life and self-confidence when he gets older. I firmly believe that if it were some grave “violation” or “mutilation” that the practice would have ended thousands of years ago. Even setting that aside, there are issues of health and hygiene to consider – it reduces the risk of various STDs and obviously prevents any sort of foreskin issue from arising, and it is easier to keep clean.

        There is a growing movement to let the boy “choose” when he gets older, which was my mother’s logic 30 years ago. Unfortunately, “choosing” to do that at an adult age is much more expensive and more of an ordeal.

        Liked by 2 people

      2. I couldn’t imagine being a grown man and then having to decide. I appreciate you putting in a male’s point of view! I am thinking of doing a follow up post as I’ve had so much controversy since posting this.

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  12. Oh Trista I nearly cried with you just imagining how heartbroken you must have felt to see your little man had been through such an ordeal, but I’m so pleased to hear that he’s fine and you feel that you’ve made the right decision. You definitely make an excellent case for circumcision, but as Lou mentions above it just wasn’t something that was discussed or offered as an option with mine in the UK. My husband is strongly against it in any regard so it isn’t something I’ve really looked into at all, but you have certainly made me stop to consider it. Maybe one for me to bring up at the next play date and see how it goes down!? 😉 Thanks for hosting #Momsterslink xx

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Oh that would be a great conversation at a play date! Apparently it’s not as common in other countries as it is here in the US. I never really gave it a second thought until after it had been done but luckily it healed perfectly and now he’s a happy 7 year old boy who has no clue what happened. I’m sure he will someday and if he feels I robbed him I’m prepared for that discussion.

      Liked by 1 person

  13. So my husband was born in the backwoods of Kentucky and thank the LORD his parents left his little weewee alone. Heaven knows that would have turned out really badly. I don;t mind it at all- also having seen both…but I will say that I was completely unprepared when I saw it for the first time. I was also probably super drunk so…

    #momsterlink

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    1. My husband feels he was robbed of his true functioning penis by being circumcised but as shallow as this may sound, I’m glad it is because I must say the person I was with that wasn’t I just couldn’t bring myself to perform certain sexual acts lol. Maybe I should have had some drinks lol.

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  14. I personally don’t like the idea, but with my boys it never even crossed my mind anyway, it really isn’t a thing I’ve ever encountered (Never had a circumcised partner, never heard stories from friends or family of having it done). I’ve heard lots of both pro and con arguments. My boys have never had any hygiene issues, nor has Husband and I’ve never had anyone (other mums or medical professionals) say a thing to me about hygiene being an issue, I’ve only ever heard the issue about cleaning baby girls after dirty nappies (always wipe front to back etc). this article is actually kinda surreal to me, like wandering into the middle of a conversation about some event that happened that everyone knows everything about, but you didn’t even know existed lol. #momsterslink

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I really am quite surprised at the controversy I have received with this post and hope to write a follow up post to possibly help other moms here in the US when making a decision on what to do. Thanks for linking up :))

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  15. We didn’t circumcise our little guy and his dad isn’t either. We just didn’t see any reason to do it. My husband has never had any hygiene issues and, being the owner of one, he can help our son learn proper cleaning. Honestly, I am not too concerned about the aesthetics of it, because the guy attached to the penis is more important than the way it looks. I actually think that circumcision is not as common in Canada and many hospitals actually make it quite difficult to have done.#momsterslink

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    1. Yes I am finding that it is not as common in other countries as it is here in the US. And I do agree that it’s all about the man and not his penis. For me it was a personal decision because I had heard of boys being bullied in PE showers and the yeast infections that develop if not properly cleaned. But when my son is older if he feels that I made a wrong decision I am prepared to have that conversation with him.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Such a tough decision to make in a crazy, sleep deprived, hormone fuelled time. I am glad to see your post though because you are treating a controversial topic with calm, considered reasoning. You are respectful of both sides and that can be a rare thing on the internet.

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  16. I’m a UK mummy and OMG I can’t even contemplate this procedure! My boy will wash and keep things clean and as far as I’m aware (and us mums do talk, a lot, about everything!!) I have not heard of any issues with infections caused by not having this done. I have never been with someone who has been circumcised so can’t comment on that, though they are not the prettiest of things anyway!! 😉 Great debate!! #momsterslink

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  17. So I have an interesting story for you Trista. I circumcised both of my boys for the hygiene reason. It was never even a question in my mind as to whether to do it or not. I want my boys to be healthy and getting rid of the foreskin was the healthier choice. Plus, my ex-husband is circumcised and he also wanted it for his sons. His sister didn’t circumcise her son and by the time he was 6 years old she had no choice but to do it because it was causing him so much pain because as you said, boys don’t care much for hygiene and while his mother did the best she could to keep it clean and to show him how to do it, it still got majorly infected. My nephew was in so much pain both before and after the procedure so I definitely think that if you’re going to circumcise, do it while they’re babies. My oldest’s circumcision went off without a hitch but with my youngest, they missed a piece. I know, weird right?! When i asked the doctor about it, he said that instead of putting him through another procedure since it’s only a small piece, just take extra care of it and as he gets older his penis will “grow into it”. Those were the doctor’s exact words. I remember worrying about when he’s older and in the locker room, would the other boys make fun of him? You really can’t notice it now but it is something I worry about sometimes. I take great care to make sure he is clean but there have been times when it has gotten infected and that is a scary thing to go through. I, personally have never been with an uncircumcised man so I can’t speak for what it’s like but I do happen to like the way the uncircumcised penis looks. It’s kind of vain though when you think about it but health reasons are the thing I care about when it comes to my boys. This is a very interesting post Trista! I love the topics you write about. Thanks for hosting #momsterlink

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I honestly never thought I’d have so much input on this post that I have. So sorry that your son’s got infected that is so scary and I couldn’t imagine what it felt like for him! And it’s stories like your nephews that scare me about any of it. It’s a decision I made and luckily it turned out ok. Thanks for linking up!

      Liked by 1 person

  18. Well, it’s not exactly the answer to the question you asked… but I was standing in the room for my first 2 sons when theirs were done and was outside with my second one when my third was in the room with the doctor and his dad. It’s definitely not a great experience to go through, and I cried too! My oldest is nearly 8 and hasn’t questioned it yet, but I do wonder if and when the questions will come, even though we did it for religious regions…

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I really just wanted to know how others felt about it. Whether it was being with someone who hadn’t had it done or as a mothers perspective. I’ve had so many thoughts and comments here and on my Instagram that I feel like I need a follow up post lol. Thanks for your input and I too am prepared for that conversation with my son if it should ever come about.

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  19. I’m from the UK and I don’t actually know of anyone who has had it done, so have never seen the results first hand. Personally I don’t like the idea of it, I feel if it wasn’t meant to be there it wouldn’t be if you know what I mean. Neither my husband or my son have ever had any hygiene issues. Like I say though, it’s just not the norm here, maybe if I lived somewhere where it was I would feel differently, who knows x
    #Momsterslink

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yes I’m finding that it really isn’t as common in other countries as here in the US. I made a decision that I felt was best and now almost 7 years later he’s a striving little boy who I am prepared to have a conversation with about my decision if it should ever arise.

      Liked by 1 person

  20. My brothers were circumcised as we were raised Jewish and when ben was born my eldest brother asked if he would be too.
    I married in a church and ben will be christened so it wouldn’t be done due to religious reasons. But I won’t do It. My brother says if he had a boy he would as he finds it cleaner and better sexually, however my husband isn’t but the cleanest man “down there” I’ve been with.
    Having seen my little brother have it done it was horrible, throw in the mix it being my child and all the hormones to boot, I think I’d be similar to you with my reaction and I don’t like the idea of the guilt. However, if for medical reasons he would need it then I wouldn’t hesitate.
    #momsterslink

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I have been doing a lot of research on it since writing this and it becoming such a controversial post. Here and on my Instagram account. I think when my son was born almost 7 years ago it was just a common thing here in the US to do. I had friends who I talked to who had all had their son’s circumcised but now researching it I have found that at some point it may not be so common anymore. Thanks for your input and being civil about it. I’ve gotten some real backlash since I posted it, which is fine, I can handle it but it’s just better when people can voice their opinion without sounding like an asshole 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I think one thing I’ve learnt being a parent is that people make choices in the best interest of their child. If they think it’s for a good reason then who am I to judge? I may not agree with it but if there is a good enough reason then there is no need to belittle someone for a choice and in this case is a hard one to make. You went into it educated and aware it wouldn’t be pleasant but in the long run would be beneficial to him. Who could be mad at that? Xx

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      2. People these days like to run around being mad about a lot of things. Myself included but I’m working on letting go of the anger and being a more positive person. And when it comes to my children I will always do what I feel is best and in a positive way.

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  21. This is a tough debate that I am currently having, being pregnant with a boy. I admit to having a slight preference for circumcised, but ultimately it does not matter. My husband is not circumcised and is strongly against the practice, but I do want to circumcise because I think it will make my son’s life easier, and every medical professional I have talked to has recommended that we do it. Maybe we will flip a coin (kidding!)

    Liked by 2 people

    1. It really is a hard decision for a mommy. My husband was against it even though he is circumcised but left the choice up to me. In the end I felt I did what was best as I had heard horror stories about infections and seen pictures. Thanks for taking the time to read and comment and good luck with your decision.

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  22. As you, I made the decision based on the fact that its just what is normal to do. I never put much thought into, until he was older and I came across an article online. We had no issues with his recovery and the procedure.

    As far as my preference, my first boyfriend (the boy I lost my virginity to) was not circumcised. So it was normal for me, I guess. I don’t care either way, as long its clean and gets the job done! 😉

    -Samantha

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It is sad that we live in such a cosmetic world sometimes. I have only ever seen one and it immediately reminded me of an anteater but I was young and these days I am not as vain as I was in my younger years. Hopefully my son will feel I made the right choice for him. Time will tell.

      Liked by 1 person

  23. I underwent foreskin restoration, so I am one of the few men who can tell the difference between the two states. There is no comparison – being intact is 10 times more pleasurable. I wrote about this in a recent post: https://majorstyles.wordpress.com/2016/12/20/how-i-restored-my-foreskin/

    I understand being conflicted about the decision you made. There is so much erroneous information out there, and we live in a culture that is dominated by pro-cut mentality. That being said, when your son gets older, I encourage you to recommend restoration to him.

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Think about it this way…If there were articles out there saying that a certain percentage of men preferred women to have a certain style of labia, would it be acceptable to cut the genitals of newborn girls?? (for the record, that’s precisely how female genital mutilations works in many places) There are soooo many myths and misunderstandings surrounding American circumcision. The hygiene thing (the notion that the foreskin needs to be forced back and cleaned thoroughly from childhood…not cool), the STD thing (the US has super high STD rates to go along with our super high circumcision rates), the “women prefer it” thing (check out Sex as Nature Intended), and all the way to circumcising in the name of Christianity which is very clear about the topic. I actually have a post about this topic I’d like to share if that’s okay. I site several sources including the American Cancer Society, Journal of Urology, multiple major medical organizations, etc. Also, I’m sure it’s been suggested already, but watch “The Elephant in the Hospital” on YouTube.

    Liked by 1 person

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