I was contacted by the lovely Tracey Clayton quite some time ago about agreeing to hostess a guest post from her on my blog. I have never done a guest post before, but thought to myself…sure why not? Then the holidays came and somewhere in the midst of hundreds of emails…her guest post got lost.
Well I am happy to say that I found it and without further a-do…here is her thoughts on “Are You Dating A Man Child?”.
Are you dating a man or a man-child?
Men are curious creatures. It takes time for a boy to become a man. But when we perceive our partner as a man, and he turns out to be more of a boy, than we have a man-child on our hands. And although having a playful man, who is in touch with his inner-child, can really spice-up the relationship, having an immature person take up your time and effort is extremely exhausting. That’s why you should always look for signs in his behavior whether or not he is a keeper.
Manning -Up to Commitment
A good relationship implies that you both grow together and as individuals. Ladies night out is always a nice change of pace for any woman, it goes the same for guys. But, if things are reversed and he only has room for you, when his boys are unavailable, then you are dealing with a man who fears commitment. A quality man always sets his priorities towards you, knowing that you are okay with him going out with his friends, but only once in a while.
Is Mother Best Really?
When it comes to the relationship with his mother, watch out for signs of a mama’s boy. If he had no independence, and mom was the one to do everything well into his manhood, then he’s still a teen at best. And you should be careful, since you are surely going to be compared to her. Everything from your cooking, cleaning, clothes, and even looks (hair included!), will be a topic for comparison. Not only that, but there’s a realistic chance that he will want to pass his mother’s role down to you. And if you don’t want to be treated as second best, and be the only adult in the relationship, moving on may be the right coarse of action.
A Financial Rock
I don’t know about you, but I like my men strong, and financially independent. This means two things: he is successful, and he has a budget to live by. With no strings attached, both of us can share in on adventures, caring more about the time we spend with each other, than who will pick up the check. It’s perfectly fine for me to treat my man once in a while to a couple of drinks, or a great meal, but when I end up paying for everything, every time, then it is time to sit down, and have a serious talk.
Clothes Make a Man
Every girl is crazy about sharp dressed men. No matter how great your man is on the inside, a mature man always reflects his confidence on the outside as well. And it’s okay to have a personal style, but torn jeans, stained and wrinkled shirts, messed up and greasy hair, are not a style. They are signs that he has no clue how to take care of himself. And when he cannot take care of himself, you have to wonder can he take care of you?
Still a Teen?
Acting your age is always an issue. We all want to go back to the wild days when we stayed out partying until dawn. But if he still has a fear of missing out, and drinking himself silly every single weekend, then he is definitely a man-child. Thinking that a lazy Saturday home with you, a quiet evening in your favorite restaurant is ludicrous, just doesn’t do it for me. Time has stopped for him, and he is still in his teens. Furthermore, he should be aware that how he acts reflects on you as well. So, if you go out together and he makes a fool out of himself, he is making a fool out of you too. Just something to take into consideration.
Expressing Their Feelings
There is nothing sexier and more alluring to women than a man bursting with self-confidence. Right? But there is a line when over-confidence and not expressing your feelings merge into immaturity. The key to a well-balanced and long-term relationship is respect. A mature man should be confident enough to know, recognize, and express his feeling. If he doesn’t, well that just means that he has a sturdy facade, but nothing to show for it on the inside.
Boys and Their Toys
There is nothing wrong in having a playful, youthful side to our individual personalities. We all used to collect something when we were kids, and in some men that inner-child is more active. If your partner likes collecting popular Davey boys toys bobbleheads, Star Wars action figures, Marvel comic books or insane amounts of records, that just means he is passionate about it. And passion is great! Just make sure that his passion for you comes first. After all, you should be his favorite play thing!
In the end, remember when seeking out a partner to be certain of his emotional stability. His character should sweep you off your feet, and not make you faint. He should make the same amount of effort and commitment into the relationship as you. If he doesn’t and his childishness is overwhelming, think of your happiness, and move on.
About The Author:
Tracey Clayton is a full time mom of three girls. She loves cooking, baking, sewing, spending quality time with her daughters and she’s passionate for writing. Her motto is: “Live the life you love, love the life you live.” Find her on Facebook.