7 Tips That Make Life As A Mom That Little Bit Easier

motherhood tips

Being a mom really is everything it’s cracked up to be. It’s amazing and changes a woman’s life in countless ways. Despite all the beauty of it, though, being a mom is incredibly hard. Here are 7 tips that will make life as a mom a little bit easier.

1. Resist the urge to go it alone.


Total self-sufficiency is the motherhood kiss of death. Raising kids is hard, exhausting work. If you’re co-parenting, make sure your partner is doing their fair share. If you’re a single mother, you need to have a network of support. Whether you’re a single mother or half of a parenting dream team, you need to say yes to offers for outside help and you need to specifically ask for help. Family members and friends are usually eager to help out. It takes a village, and if you try to go it alone, you’ll end up permanently exhausted and unhappy.

2. Forget about perfect.


Forget the dreams you had about motherhood. Forget the Pinterest boards full of amazing kid ideas. Forget the images of perfect lives you see from other moms on social media. Lots of days of being a mom will be perfect, full of that incomparable joy you felt the first time you held your baby. But plenty of days will also be hard and messy and not at all perfect. Throw the idea of perfect out the window and you’ll learn to appreciate the magic packed into all those messy days. Stop giving yourself a hard time for failing to live up to those Pinterest boards and celebrity mom Instagram posts. Those are staged glimpses at ideal moments. They’re occasionally achievable, but that’s only one little piece of the picture. Reality, in all its messy glory, is its own kind of perfection.

3. Every age is the best.

Don’t approach your kid’s childhood as groups of fun ages and ages to dread. Forget about the terrible twos and the terrible tweens. Even forget about the magic of babyhood or the delight of having school-age children. Every single age of a child is amazing and special in its own way. Every age is also hard in its own way. The cliche is true: it all goes by so fast. Find something to love and cherish about each age. Don’t miss the magic of right now because you’re living in the past or the future.

4. Remember that mom stuff can be cute and stylish.

Being a mom means owning and hauling around all kinds of things for your kids. Just because it’s for a practical purpose, though, doesn’t mean it has to be ugly! Choose products that fit your sense of style, products that make you smile, products that will make you the envy of all the other moms. Choose a cute diaper bag and you’ll be prepared to keep your baby clean and happy when you’re out and about, but you’ll also feel happy yourself for rocking some sweet baby swag. Shopping for kid stuff can have the same joy as shopping for shoes or handbags when you realize that kid stuff can be cute and fashionable.



5. Remember that being a mom is just one part of who you are.


Motherhood is amazing and can be all-consuming. It’s all too easy to let it completely take over your identity. Remember that there are other parts of you, too. You’re still a partner, child, sibling, career-woman, painter, yogi, churchgoer, sports fan, or whatever else makes you uniquely you. Be a mom, but not a mom to the exclusion of everything else. Take time for yourself. You’ll be happier, but as a bonus, your child will learn a pretty important lesson in seeing you do this.

6. Watch out for clutter.
Having kids means having a lot of extra stuff.

A lot of it is vital and a lot of it is imbued with all kinds of special memories, but a lot of it is clutter. Get in the habit of clearing out what you don’t need regularly or you’ll eventually be looking at a mountain of crap. Go through your kid’s clothing and toy collection and find a new home (donate, give away, sell, trash) for anything you no longer need. Kid art is particularly hard to part with, but you will amass a lot of it very quickly. Save the most special pieces and scan all the rest. You’ll still be able to look back at that scribbled drawing from age 2 and that self-portrait from age 5, but you won’t have to dig through 10 overstuffed bins of artwork to find it. You might even implement a rule that for every new item that comes in the house, one must go out. New toy in, old toy out. Decluttering kid things can get trickier as your child gets older, but it’s another great teaching moment. Involve your kid in the decision-making process for what stays and what goes and it will be less traumatic.

Children are hilarious and parenting is full of hysterical moments. Don’t forget to laugh. Laugh often and take the time to record some of the funniest stories. Keep a journal where you write down all the cute things your kid says or does and mark the date. Whether handwritten or digital, this will be a favorite thing to look back on for many years to come. You will not regret doing this. You might think that you’ll remember all of these moments, but you won’t. Sure, you’ll remember many of them, but a lot of gold will slip through the cracks of your memory. As your kids get older, they’ll love it as well and you can belly laugh about it together. Of course, some of the stories you’ve recorded are sure to be embarrassing to your kids as they get older, but sometimes that makes it even more fun.

Disclaimer:  This post was sent to me as a guest post and none of these words are that of my own.

Domesticated Momster

I Am The Mother Of A Soldier

Never did I think that I would hear those words escape from my mouth but the truth is, I am officially the mother of a soldier.

I had the honor of attending my oldest son’s graduation from basic training  in Fort Leonard Wood, MO.  And I must say that it will be one of the fondest memories I possess in my life.

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As a parent we raise our children in hopes that they will be successful, but for a mother of a soldier it’s just a bit of a catch 22 for me.  As proud as I am of him, we also live in a world of uncertainty right now.

I took my seat that morning and watched as each group of these young men and women marched their way to the stage and one by one called off their names and where they were from.  And when my child came forth, I barely recognized him.  He was all grown up.  He had already changed.

I thought about all their family and friends in the audience who were watching and wondering if they were all having the same feelings as me.  The feelings of pride, joy, love, fear, understanding, and of course uncertainty.  If their whirl wind of emotions, were blowing in the same direction as mine.

I sat across from my son, dressed in his Army issued tailored blues, made just for him.  And I couldn’t help but think that just yesterday he was this 10 year old little boy, with no thoughts of where he would be sitting on this very day across from me.

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I thought about the past year and a half and what he has overcome.  That he made some bad choices but made some self discovery along the way and in the end chose the right path.

I thought about the last time I saw him and how many things were said between us.  A conversation that hasn’t been finished.

I also thought about my 4 other children, who are all growing up so fast, and that as soon as I blink my eyes, this person sitting across from me, will be my 4 year old.  All grown up and no longer needing my undivided attention and me knowing that I did my best to give her and all of her siblings the love, life skills, and childhood memories that will give them the best wings to fly.  To know that I tried to be the best mother I could…even when some days mothering required every ounce of me that I had.

Watching this ceremony and hearing of my son’s stories of his journey so far, gave me a new found respect for these young men and women who take an oath to protect and serve their country.  To protect some of the freedoms that so many of us take for granted.  To sign on a dotted line not knowing the unpredictability that lies ahead.

Basically giving up their freedom…to ensure ours.

The last night I was there, I walked my son up the sidewalk near his barracks.  I promised I wouldn’t cry.  I promised that I would be strong and send him on his way.   I hugged him tight, told him I loved him, and then as soon as I turned to head toward’s the car all those tears poured out.

I hadn’t cried like that in a long time.

But it wasn’t just because I am the mother of a soldier, it’s because I am a mother, and for the first time since becoming a mother, I had a taste of what it was like to let go, and that before long, I would have to let go of all of them.

To Bryan,

I know your blood doesn’t share my blood but I will always think of you as my son.  There are so many things that you won’t understand until you have children of your own.  

I hope you know how proud your dad and I are of the person you have become.  That you chose to be a better person, even with so many odds against you.

I hope you understand how much we love you.  And how much we never stopped loving you…even when you weren’t making the best of choices.

I hope you understand the reasons of why we had to make some of the choices we made.  I don’t regret those choices…especially if it gave you the will to prove you could make it.  That you could be a better person even with the hand of cards you had been dealt.

I hope you will always know…this is your home.

Love,

Mom

PS:  Never lose sight of the boy on the left.  He’s formed the man on the right.

mother soldier kids growing up

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Quote Of The Week ~ May 8, 2016

Today is Mother’s Day here in the US and while I was laying here in my bed debating whether to go back to sleep (my teenagers gift was to get up with the littles) or to stay in here and hide out a little while longer, I started to reflect on what Mother’s Day means to me.

Now of course there’s the side of me that wants to get in the car, drive to the city, go to the spa, eat sushi, get my kid infested Yukon detailed, maybe catch a movie, and then get home after the kids have already been put to bed.

For one my husband has to work today and I don’t expect my teenager to play parent all day.

But in reality I know that I have a 6 year old little boy out there that has been talking about his Mother’s Day gift he made for me for the last week and the excitement in his eyes when he talks about is just one of the biggest joys of motherhood.

On Thursday the preschool my girls attend, had a Mother’s Day celebration and when I opened the gift that my 4 year old made (a mold of clay shaped as her hand) I began to cry because as a mom I know her hand will not always be that small.

My 5 year old planted Baby’s Breath in a little pot she painted and decorated and we have been watering and taking care of it everyday.  She’s been waiting patiently to plant it into a bigger pot.  I will of course treasure the tiny decorated pot forever.

Mother’s Day is not just about a day, it’s about being a mother all the time.  Being a mother whose loved and adored by her children.  It’s about making sacrifices to ensure their happiness.  Being there when the world or life fails them sometimes. Putting your own thoughts and frustrations aside  even when they become adults.

To always be the mother they can turn to.

It’s about being the best mom you can be and being rewarded with their love and admiration.  It’s precious…never take it for granted.

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From one mother to another, hug your kids, kiss your kids, and always love your kids and show that love because they grow so fast and I for one never want to look back on my motherhood and have too many regrets.

Happy Mother’s Day,


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Throwback Thursday ~I Am A MomWho

 

From the time the little mini monsters come out of our bodies it is a constant cater to everything pertaining to their well being.  Our own well being suddenly becomes extinct.  We no longer have days at the salon or days spent window shopping at the mall…oh wait I didn’t really do that even before I had kids.

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*Gets to stay home and watch her children grow each and every day.

~This also means I am I am never away from you…well sometimes but rarely

*Loves to watch every exciting new moment discovered in your eyes.

~Especially when you decide to apply toothpaste to every crevice of the house…or peanut butter…oh and let’s not forget SYRUP!

*Couldn’t imagine her life without you in it.

~Just please let me sleep in for once!

*Watches you interact with one another and realizes the choice to have more then one was the right choice.

~Then you start fighting!  Thought destroyed…moment over, done, past tense.

*Sees how much you are growing up and starting to be more independent by picking up your toys.

~Oh wait that requires bribery and a big bottle glass of wine when we are done.

*Wants to love you, and squeeze you, and smother you with kisses.

~What’s that smell?  Is that fucking poop in your hair?

*Loves to watch you run and play outside as the sun beats on your beautiful face.

~Is that dog shit on your shoe?  GET BACK OUTSIDE!

*Just look how innocent you look while you are sleeping.

~Whats that on your sheets?  IS THAT PERMANENT MARKER?!?!

*Would do anything for her children.

~No you can’t have another sibling!

*Loves being your mommy.

~Through good times and bad…all the time.

Mommy Of The Year,

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National Couples Appreciation Month

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April is National Couples Appreciation Month.  So if you haven’t let your other half know how much you want to kill them appreciate them in awhile…then sometime this month is your chance.

My husband and I have been together since November of 2008, after meeting on the internet.  It didn’t take us long to become inseparable.  The fact that he could make me laugh ALL THE TIME is what attracted me to him the most.  He’s not bad to look at either.  *wink wink*  I mean who wouldn’t fall in love with someone who was brave enough to show off “the goat” after about a week of dating.

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Now I am sure you are wondering what “the goat” is right?  And I even tried to find an image of it on the internet with no success.  Basically it has to do with a man being naked and then tucking his balls between his legs and mooning you.  I was tempted to have my husband demonstrate his lovely talent but I don’t want to scare anyone.  But if you are laughing right now, then you have obviously painted a picture in your head and we are good!

Moving on….

We have been through a lot of ups and downs throughout the years, just like any relationship.  But I can honestly say that the ups still outweigh the downs tremendously.  We are both stubborn as hell which doesn’t help when we find some ridiculous thing to argue about like who’s better at driving or who takes longer to get ready for a date night.  But through it all I have come to realize that no matter what…he’s the one person in this world who has and always will have my back.  Who has seen me at my worst and still managed not to run for the hills to keep on loving me.

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I know I don’t tell him enough how much I appreciate him.  I think we both just get busy with daily life sometimes and forget that this life we have built starts with the strong foundation we created…us.  We both work hard to provide love and stability for our family.

We recently had the pleasure of spending an entire week together, on vacation, with no kids.  The best part about the vacation was that I realized the foundation is still here…even with all the cracks and all the wear and tear it’s still just as strong, if not stronger, than the first day we met.  Or should I say, since the first day he showed me “the goat”?

Have you appreciated your other half lately?

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Quote Of The Week ~ March 6, 2016

 quotes motherhood mothers day inspirational  
Today is Mother’s Day in the UK so in honor of all the wonderful mothers who I have met through blogging this quote is dedicated to you and of course all mothers everywhere.  

Being a mother, for me, has been the greatest gift and the biggest challenge of my life.  Motherhood fills your heart with joy and love like no other and some days can test the deepest parts of yourself  you didn’t know existed.  But a good mother finds balance.  She finds strength and she loves unconditionally.

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Quote Of The Week ~ Feb 14, 2016

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In honor of Valentine’s Day this is dedicated to my husband.   He drives me crazy sometimes but just enough to keep love interesting.

I believe that love and marriage aren’t always perfect.  That you always have to put effort where effort is needed and pay attention to the person you chose to spend your life with.

Love doesn’t belong on auto-pilot.  It deserves to keep being reinvented.  To be reminded of what made love spark in the first place.

And remember if you are lucky enough to find someone who makes living, loving, and spending your life with, worth every minute…never…ever…take it for granted.

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