National Snowman Burning Day

Yep, you read that right folks…today is National Snowman Burning Day and I for one am SICK of winter.  Granted, in the following video, the woman doesn’t set the Snowman on fire but she clearly gets her point across.  I have watched this video at least a dozen times and laugh my ass off each and every time.

Because I for one can TOTALLY relate.

It seems like we have had snowfall upon snowfall since November.  And as much as I love the fact that so many water holes that had been empty are now full,  I am ready to put my swimsuit on and get in them, fish in them, boat on them, and camp by them,  rather than just look at them on the news or from the highway.

I am ready to soak up some vitamin D in which my body has been lacking the entire winter and I do believe has turned me into a psychopath an albino like zombie.  **sprays the self tanner on her skin**

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Now there have been a few days of this month that the weather has played with our heads.  It’s even gotten up to 70*F, even if it was for only one day.  But then the very next day it will be 32*F and snowing outside.

I don’t know whether to get the summer clothes out or just keep buying new winter clothes because my kids are all growing out of the stuff they have had since school started.  **thinks of just setting fire to anything that has to do with winter in hopes that it will bring some spring juju**

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And then there is that dreadful W word…no not winter…the other one.  W-I-N-D.  You wake up to see that the sun is peaking through the blinds and you jump out of bed to look outside only to find that your patio furniture is now upside down in a pile against the fence because the wind is blowing 60mph.

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And who wants to go out in that?

You can’t even fly a kite because the force of the wind will whip it right out of your hands.  Forget about doing your hair…even a messy bun can’t survive the brunt of those gail force winds.  The dust blows in your eyes, down your throat, and even into places you didn’t know dust could get into while being fully dressed.

Then there’s the dreaded “couped up indoors with the kids” syndrome.  You’ve pulled crafts off Pinterest, played 100 too many games of Sorry, and even done the unthinkable … MADE THEM CLEAN!

Motherhood mommy dearest winter
There actually isn’t any snow left in our yard right now so there won’t be any celebration of National Snowman Burning Day around here, but perhaps I could find a leftover stuffed one in the clearance isle at our local Wal-Mart and tell the kids we are trying out a new ritual to try and welcome spring.

National Burning Snowman Day humor
Burn you damn snowman…I want spring!
Cheers To Spring,

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Dear Mr. Weather

Yo asshole could you make up your mind!  Yesterday it was a lovely 72 degrees outside and today I wake up to snowing!!!  It’s no wonder that we are all sick here.

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I wanted this weather a long time ago.  Now….now I am ready for spring and warmer weather, less clothes, less laundry to do, and the littles being able to go outside without being bundled up like an eskimo.  Do you know how long it takes to get 3 toddlers bundled up to go outside in the cold?  It’s a real bitch!  Takes 30 minutes to locate all the necessities and then another 20 to put them on.  And then guess what?  They want to come back inside 5 minutes later.  And what am I suppose to do say “no”?  You did notice that I said I had 3 toddlers right?  I am outnumbered here.  Saying “no’ to their wishes means having to listen to screaming and crying and temper tantrums.   And I for one don’t like that.  Also, I don’t have the option of duct taping their mouths and locking them in their rooms.  That is frowned upon around here.  Will put me right into “horrible mother” status!

There has been a constant circle of illness in my house since before Christmas!!!  I am tired of wiping noses and finding booger infested tissue stuffed in every crevice of my house.  I am tired of BUYING tissue.  Even Costco doesn’t sell a quantity substantial enough for this monstrous, snot blowing household!

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I am tired of trips to the doctors office.  They have become to know me by first name there.  Hell, they know my voice when I call!  “Good morning Mrs. Souza…which one of the flock will you be bringing in today?”  Next they will have quarantined off a room just for us!  The sickies!!!

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Don’t get me started on how many bottles of medicine I have acquired in my cabinet.  I have to pay close attention to the labels since I have 3 different toddlers at 3 different stages.  One can’t take this and the other one has a bad reaction to that.  And could someone please tell me why they have to make medicine taste fruity?  That just makes my kids want some even when they aren’t sick!  Like it’s candy or a treat.  I then have to lie to them and tell them there isn’t anymore and that mommy will get some at the store.  Bad mommy for lying.

Now I am not sure that this is all to blame on you Mr. Weather but your daily forecast  shenanigans aren’t helping.  I don’t mind some rain with warmer temperatures…but this 30 some degrees atmospheric pressure is enough to switch me from wine to vodka!

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Sincerely,

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Photography: Easter 2015

Zoelleeaster2015

This would be my top pick of the photographs

I captured on Easter.  

            Baby Z, with a face full of bliss,

                              showing me her hidden treasure.

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